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| The first smile...... :) |
It's been a great journey so far and I am sure it's gonna be better on the way ahead. Nevan's 11 months birthday this week, brought with itself a glimpse of some candid moments which touched me from within and lead to some dampness in my eyes.
These months have been life-changing for me and my husband, a magic happened and along came all the happiness in our lives, with some other odd situations (Obviously!).....but then in between these Good-Better-Best times there were some awestruck moments which rang the bell and made me a Mother & my darling husband a Father.
So here I am sharing with you all some of these events which defined the New Character (MOM) within me:
- When I took him into my arms for the first time: I still remember those trembling hands of mine, the hospital room full of people;family and relatives talking to each other and but my eyes are stuck upon my baby whom the nurse was about to handover to me. A look at my husband and a look again at him told me, "Here I am Momma.... and I said in turn You are my World".
- Seeing him in the ICU: Less than a day with him and I was so weak and tired. Suddenly around 1am he is crying endlessly and I am told to sleep and the baby is taken out. I get up at 4am, and go to the nursery outside my room to find out my son has got admitted into the ICU due to disruptive breathing. Less than 30 hours of my delivery, at that wee hour of the day I decide to go to the ICU all by myself, walking with a hazy vision and small steps. I reached the ICU and saw him lie naked, upside down and my heart just sank. The ICU nurse held me quickly and gave me a seat and I still can't define what was happening within me. A harrowing feeling, of seeing my heart on a table with all the attachments put on his lil body. That was the moment that shook me from within and gave me a pain which I had never experienced again coz now I was a mom and my child was in pain.
- His first co-sleep with me: Back home, when we slept together for the first time I got up after every single minute to check if he was fine, if the room temp is too cold, or if he is covered well and moreover kept on touching him to feel his breath to assure myself 'all is well'. I felt like a mad women who has become a zombie with all the sleepless nights and a weak body.
- When all romantic songs used to remind me of my son & not my hubby: Funny though but when I heard the song of Ashique 2, "Tum he ho" I just used to think of Nevan till the point when a friend sang it for her hubby on his birthday and I realized, 'Oh ya, it can be dedicated to Ankur(my hubby) too!'
- When Nevan was on my mind 24*7: So my brain started getting so strained & was functioning round the clock in thoughts like; is he hungry?, Is he wet? What should I feed him now? How much ounce of milk he had today? Why is his poop green today? What should be his next toys? Should introduction of books happen at 6 months? When is his next vaccine due?, etc etc etc etc etc.....
And we became friends very soon!!! - When going out with friends & family meant more of rushing and missing him than enjoyment: For me, the first trip out of home was not friends or movie but a personal doctor visit in which I told the receptionist infinite no of times that I have a small baby waiting at home; but however when a friend pulled me out of the house for the first time without Nevan, I couldn't talk to her or even eat or even enjoy being away from a baby's chores....I called up home almost 6 times in 3 hours and finally my friend told me to go home as I was not doing anything else except talk about the baby or call home to ask how he is doing.....so she dropped me back & as I got off the car, she bid me good-bye & said, "U know what, you have suddenly transformed from Himani to Nevan's mom".....
- Upon hearing the magical words from his mouth: "Mum-ma": At almost 8 months Nevan called out the magical words 'Mumma' & 'Papa' and we became parents from mere caretakers.
- List of most frequently visited sites changed to- Baby Centre, Parenting, etc and Magazines shifted to - Child development related books: Suddenly my starred websites were all the baby related stuff; right from the color of poop queries to why the baby is sleeping and why he isn't. It's all insane as everything around me or the house changed to Nevan. So 'Nevan sneezed today' became the biggest concern of my life and I used to read up all the possible information online & in the baby magazine's to find out ways to prevent cold in babies.
- A visit to the mall in which I was asked, "Is that your baby?": A spontaneous yes to the lady on the adjoining table in the restaurant, left me thinking "Really......MY BABY" and ting-tong the bell rang yet again!
- Filling up his Passport Form in which I filled my name in place of 'Mother's Name': This was amongst the initial document which I filled for him and suddenly there is a place for Mother's Name and wow.....I have to fill in my name there....I am a MOTHER!!!
- The first fall of my son meant more crying for me than for him: Nevan's first fall was on his 11th month bday. As we were almost through with the day, he was playing in his cot and I was right next to him and he just toppled over his cot. He was as stunned as me. But he was fine after a burst of cry but I went on for two hours. My brain went numb and I lost my senses to even evaluate the cause of the fall for those first couple of hours.
Pls share your experiences and your moments of truth's which made you a MOM.....Hope to have some other great experiences to share.
